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Put on Shoes - Limited Edition Box Set *SOLD OUT* vs. Shadowiii
Put on Shoes - Limited Edition Box Set *SOLD OUT* Victory shall be mine!
Download: 948B
Play Time: 239 hours and 48 minutes
Review # 50 for Shadowiii Victory shall be mine!
Them's Fightin' Words
    Every once in a while something comes along that really makes us stand up and shot. It makes is realize WHY we make OHR games. It makes is understand WHY we work so hard on an old, obsolete engine to impress peers we'll probably never meet in the flesh. It brings the bonds of community together, as we all move towards a greater, brighter future of OHR game making.

This isn't one of those things. But it is pretty damn awesome.
    "When my "Put On Shoes: The Movie" special collector's boxed set first arrived in the mail, I was so happy I almost wet myself. And I hadn't even opened the UPS box! When I finally did (I did wet myself that time :( ), I was amazed at what I saw. Lying within, like the 10 Commandments in the Ark of the Covenant, my Put on Shoes: The Movie Special Limited Edition Collector's Boxed Set lay. The rays of sun from my dorm window glinted off the wrapping, sending scattered shafts of rainbow light all over my room. It's beauty, its power, its majesty amazed me so I had to lie down. The box was beautiful...beautiful beyond my comprehension. A simple picture of a shoe adorned the box’s humble, yet beautiful cover. The words "Put On Shoes: The Movie" in black, size 72 font yelled at me, proclaiming the incredible power of the contents that lay within. I could barely hold myself back from screaming with joy, so yell I did. I danced, I cried, the tears of joy flowed like excrement through the bowls after eating a keg of exlax. I was complete."

Put on Shoes RPG : It was made for the horrible game contest, so it looks pretty bad. But by bad I mean awesome, and by awesome I mean it fits perfectly. A happy face and some shoes. Well, outlines of shoes. At any rate it is pretty ugly, but it does what it is supposed to do.

Put on Shoes: The Movie! : Uh, it's an ohr/html/gif movie drawn in the style of Put on Shoes RPG. It's pretty ugly also, but that's what makes it so much more awesome.

Put on Shoes: Live Action Movie! : The real life adventure of the real life hero, on his endless quest to put on his shoes. How many can he put on? How many will he put on? The questions beg an answer, and the answer can be found in this movie. Oh yeah, graphics, it's a live action movie. The guy's costume is pretty frickin rockin.
    "I finally gathered the courage to touch it, my prize placed ever-so-gently in its foam popcorn packing. I was almost afraid that I'd damage it; that my beautiful treasure would disappear and I would enter a world of nightmare that I'd know no escape. But the conviction was true, the object real. As I lifted it from the box I felt that it was heavy, heavy with an incredible majesty. I lay it on my Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles bedsheets and stared at it, pondering. I sat silent, looking the box over. Its beauty captivated me even more-so now then before, for now I could behold all it's peanut-free glory. I had the Put on Shoes: The Movie Special Limited Edition Collector's Boxed Set...ON MY BED. The sheer ecstasy of it almost compelled me to end life there...I would die at the peak of my life's joy, as little could surpass this. But I still had one more task. Gently I removed the plastic wrapping that protected the oh-so-precious contents within. With trembling hands I began to open the top lid."

Put on Shoes RPG - Uh, there really isn't a story. Your goal is to put on as many shoes as possible, to beat the high score. However, you are timed, so be careful! Your goal will be difficult. Our hero must grab shoes quickly and carefully if he is going to surpass his predecessor!

Put on Shoes: The Movie - This takes the RPG and brings it into its first, Oscar-nominated iteration. With a screenplay based off the RPG, it is probably one of the best Video Game --> Movie transitions Hollywood has ever seen (besides Super Mario Brothers, of course). You follow the smilie on his great and dangerous quest through many worlds, meeting many strange and wonderful creatures, flying on airships constructed by legendary engineers, all to get a pair. But woe! The ending is emotionally breathtaking, and incredibly tragic. For as our hero grabs his first pair of shoes, his time has reached the end! I won't want to spoil the ending for you, but I can say that you will be bawling like a baby when the ending comes.

Put on Shoes: Live Action Movie!: The long anticipated sequel to the first movie, the Live Action Movie is my best bet for winning best picture in the 2004 Oscars. In fact, I'm pretty sure it'll basically sweep every category, with our hero taking best actor, that guy in the car as best supporting, the first shoe as best actress, the second as supporting actress (and I must say, the second shoe performs her job especially well. I'd be surprised if she doesn't have companies crawling down her throat for her next big project). Cinematography is fantastic, and the soundtrack blows me away. However, about the story, I must say I cannot pick which of the three adventures I like better, as they all are perfect in so many ways. This one tells the story of our gallant hero, who awakens to find himself without his shoes, and so begins his grand quest to recover them. The actions are captivating, the scenery breathtaking, the special effects blow everything else out of the water. Our hero at last finds one shoe, but we all know the old adage that "Shoes Come in Pairs," and so it seems our hero's quest is not over yet! But what is this? Look afar, warrior! For there it is...the missing counterpart to the first shoe you have found! Run hero, run, and recover it! I dare not spoil the ending for you, but I will say it had everyone I know so far on the edge of their seats that they had painful butts for two weeks after. Incredible.
    "After a good twenty minutes of perspiring, my sweaty palms at last responded to my brain's electromagnetic jolts and, every so carefully, removed the lit from my Put on Shoes: The Movie Special Limited Edition Collector's Boxed Set. I lie not, for as I opened that, a pillar of light sprang forth from the box, its brightness and glory so incredible I fainted. When I at last awoke, the light was gone, and in my hands still lay the Put on Shoes: The Movie Special Limited Edition Collector's Boxed Set. I slowly and carefully sat up, placing the box onto my bed. I then reached my hand inside and began gently, as gently as a mother holds her newborn child, removing the contents that lay within. The first to come out was the original Put On Shoes RPG. The legend, the game that had so captivated me throughout my childhood years. As waves of nostalgia washed over me like waves of the sea on the beaches of a deserted island off the coast of Florida, I felt compelled to play it there and then. But I knew I must push on! Like the hero of old, who's determination to find his shoes was unwavering, so must I continue my pursuit and empty the remainder of the box! Again I thrust my hand in, and this time I removed Put on Shoes: The Movie, complete with OST. I was overcome with emotion as I placed it alongside its blood brother, Put On Shoes RPG, and reached again into the box. I recovered yet another spectacular prize: the Put on Shoes: Live Action Movie! Oh, what joy filled my heart as I lay this alongside the other two great treasures that now sat peacefully on my bedsheets! My final prizes were the secret, behind the scenes document, which confirmed all my suspicions regarding the game, and the OST for the movie. At last, the box was empty. It sat there, a shell of it's former self, but still glorious enough to hold it's own. I turned slowly, with tears in my eyes, towards my prizes that now lay on my bed. Which to choose first?"

The only thing with actual gameplay in this boxed set would have to be Put on Shoes RPG, as the rest are either OSTs or movies. Put on Shoes RPG is a difficult game, to say the least. Your goal is simple: get enough shoes to beat the high score. However, life is not that easy! You are racing against the clock, in a gutwrenching, mad-dash to beat the high score! Can you beat it? How many can YOU put on?
    "My first selection was the original rpg, Put on Shoes RPG. I slowly booted it up in my computer, only to find it didn't come with an included .exe file! Did someone screw it up!? Luckily, I knew where to get one, so I was playing in no time. I was a bit rusty, so in the first wild game I didn't manage to beat the high score. However, the game proved as addicting as ever, and I found myself playing it over and over, long into the night. My adrenaline was pumping fast, my palms were sweating, and my keyboard was sticky with sweat, yet I persevered. On and on I played, trying harder and harder to beat the high score. I would triumph! I must! The game was as fast-paced, nerve-wracking, and addicting as I remembered it from back in my youthful years. Again I played, and again I failed. The game was so difficult, yet so perfect! I wanted to win; I wanted to keep on playing! The high score would be mine!"

There is only one battle: The battle of a man on a great quest to recover his shoes. His quest has many dangers, both emotional and physical, but our hero will persevere! The battles may torment him, but his eyes are on but one goal, and his vision will never grow dim!
  Map Design
    "When at last I had exhausted myself of the original Put on Shoes RPG, I decided that it was time to bring forth the first movie base off the epic. I was delightfully surprised to find that there were two versions: an HTML version for those techno-internet types, and an OHR version for those ADHD-gamer types. Being a mixture of the two, I had a hard time deciding which version to watch first. They both seemed so perfect! How could I pick between two Holy Grails of cinematography? At last I made my decision: I'd watch both at once! I must now warn the reader of my tale: to the untrained mind, this feat can cause one to go into such a state of ecstasy that you might fall into a lapse and never recover! Luckily, I was well-trained thanks to have played Put on Shoes RPG for the past few days and nights, so I managed to survive without too much damage. The film was as incredible as when I saw the premiere a few months before. The ending left me bawling on the floor for a good two hours. The tragedy! The struggle! So close to accomplishing his goal, and at the last minute...I am sorry, my friends, but I'll need to take a short break from my story now, as I'm getting choked up just thinking about it..."

Put on Shoes RPG: One map, many shoes, a grand adventure. Can you get them all? The map is difficult, the time short, the task ominous. However, one well knowledge in the OHR and debug keys will find the task less difficult. The maps are perfect, simply incredible.

Put on Shoes: The Movie: There aren't actual maps, but there is scenery. I must say, it is incredible. The journey takes our hero through snow-covered peaks, through slimy bogs, into the air on magnificent airships, through the big city, across the quiet countryside...the list goes on. There are so many sites to see, so many wonders to behold, I can barely take it all in.

Put on Shoes: Live Action Movie!: More of the same above, except the colors are a bit more vivid, and the landscapes a bit more beautiful. Our hero once again covers the world in his search for his shoes, and once again the maps are incredible. I cannot believe there are such beautiful places on this planet, and yet I witness them with my own eyes! Astounding.
    "At last I approached the final behemoth in the package: Put on Shoes: Live Action Movie! I had never seen this one before, so I was very excited as I put the DVD into my computer. Within moments I found myself on the edge of my seat, my jaw on the floor, and my eyes wet with tears. It was so beautiful, so perfect! A perfect translation of the game and the first movie, now in vivid Technicolor and with real actors! Shortly after the film was done, I watched it again. I repeated this so many times I lost count, but as I was watching it one of these many times I called the Oscar Board and demanded they get a copy. The results I got from them were mixed, but I'm pretty sure this one is going to totally take the 2004 Oscars by storm. I am totally not joking. You though Lord of the Rings swept the Oscars? I doubt it! This one is going to go all the way, the first movie to walk away with every Academy Award they can give! Heck, they'll probably have to make up special awards to give it, just so it'll leave with more! The film took my breath away, sold it on ebay, and gave me a recite. I can hardly believe even now that men can make such a wonder. Every time I watch the movie, it is like the first time all over...with my innocent, shoe-less eyes watching the story of a man and his quest to find shoes. I was blown out of my chair, all the way into the next hall."

The game is hard. Can you beat the high score? I doubt it, because you aren't nearly good enough.
    "As I had conquered the biggest of my three challenges, I turned to the OST. The package was incredible enough to include both the original soundtrack for the first movie, as well as the special, fully orchestrated soundtrack for the second movie. I will admit, when I like a song I listen to it A LOT. And by a lot I mean I put it on iTunes, hit "repeat one", and leave it on for days. Heck, it's still playing right now! I uploaded both of the files and made a whole separate playlist just for them, and am listening to both of them over and over this very minute! The music is inspires, captivates, and motivates. It lassos in the senses, captures the emotions, and conveys more feeling then any song I have ever heard. I was compelled to buy more boxed sets, just so I could say I owned more copied of this soundtrack! In fact, I think I might just do that!"

Put on Shoes RPG - No sound. That's bad. :(

Put on Shoes: The Movie: A very weird little song plays through the movie. It's sort of a journey/hero type thing (think the main adventurer’s theme in Lord of the Rings, only not as good :P). It's in midi (or BAM, if you play the OHR version), but it still sounds pretty good either way.

Put on Shoes: Live Action Movie!: Heh, the soundtrack made me laugh. Setu cranked the original Put on Shoes: The Movie song up into an mp3, and it sounds a lot better. Paired with the visuals, it makes the movie a laugh riot.
    "I finally examined the last of the collection, the Behind the Scenes secret document. I must say, after wondering for the longest time how the creator of the game series comes up with his ideas, or how Put on Shoes RPG was designed, this finally answered all my questions. I was astounded, to say the least, at how profound yet simple it was. It was perfect. It wasn't what I imagined, but it was what I had known in my heart all along had happened. I felt a fresh rush of relief and peace flow over me as I read it. I now knew how the creator thought, what his goals were, and why he had made the game. I had finished the boxed set, and I was complete."

For some odd reason, I really enjoyed this "boxed set." Put on Shoes is probably the OHR's first "Cult Classic", in that a few people really adore it and others don't give a damn. I think that this idea was really awesome, and is quite hilarious as well. I liked all the movies a lot, and I laughed for a long time after (which doesn't happen often). Overall, I had a great time with this "Limited Edition Collector's Edition Boxed Set," and I'm sure most of you will too.
Final Blows
    "With a tear in my eye, yet with a happy heart I boxed up my Put on Shoes: Special Limited Edition Collector's Boxed Set, having completed all the games. I knew I'd return to them soon, but as for now I had at last exhausted all of the objects the box had contained, and now it was time to move on. I would never again experience the joys, the excitement, the suspense, and the drama as I had the first time I interacted with all the media the box contained. I gave a small sigh as I put it on it's $2000 shrine I had purchased off eBay, and watched as the pieces of diamond dust from the diamond dust dispenser at the top of the shrine sprinkled over it, and as the lights shining from both sides sent sparkling rays of light from the transparent rocks. My journey was over, and yet it was just beginning. I had put on one shoe. But could I get another? That, my friends, is the question we must ask ourselves every day of our lives. Can we get both shoes?"

Ok, this review is a bit of a joke, but there are a few points I'd like to touch on. First, the idea of going this far with a joke is probably what makes it so funny. I mean, how many other OHR games have live action movies to go with them? I haven't seen something that funny since LOLWTF COMIX: TERROR REDUX.
Secondly, Put on Shoes RPG is stupid. Sure, it is. But it's brilliantly stupid, and surprisingly funny. Any joke, especially a bad one, when taken too far turns out to be a good, funny joke after all. Put on Shoes is like this. There was nothing extremely special about Put on Shoes RPG, but for some of us we found it extremely funny in its own way. Don't ask me why, but I still think the game is a laugh riot (The Shoes Put on You is also rockin, I was sad that it wasn't in this boxed set :( ).
Overall, this gave me a lot more entertainment then quite a few OHR games I've played so far. Sure, someone's going to counter-review just to put the grade down, but I think it's a totally awesome idea, and the fact that Squall and Hawk took it so far is really awesome. I guess it shows determination for your project, even if the project, at first glance, doesn't seem worthy of all this effort put into it.

It's really quite funny (especially because Put on Shoes RPG was made for a horrible game contest, and it has spun out this far), and I highly recommend you get it. Just be sure to take it with a grain of salt.
Our gallant hero, holding his spoils of war. Hurry, hero, find another shoe before time runs out!

Our gallant hero, holding his spoils of war. Hurry, hero, find another shoe before time runs out!
Final Scores
Graphics: 5/10.0
Well, there's technically two OHR files in here, and both are horribly bad (for a reason, though). I really liked the guy's costume in the movie, though. It was perfect.
Storyline: 10/10.0
There wasn't one, and now there is, and it's still stupid. But it is so funny! The ending of the second film (the Live Action one) is most awsome. I was laughing for a long time. Great work.
Gameplay: 9.5/10.0
Only Put on Shoes RPG has gameplay. It's really hard, sure, but that's why it's so rocken. Can you beat the high score?
Music: 10/10.0
Ha! I love the music. I wish Put on Shoes RPG had some, but I guess I can live without it. Setu's remix was hilarious as well.
Enjoyment: 10/10.0
Hilarious concept, executed almost flawlessly. This collection is a laugh riot. Get it, just don't take it seriously (or, on the other hand, you can take it REALLY SERIOUSLY :P).
Overall Grade: A+
Final Thoughts
    How many can YOU put on?  

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