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R vs. Shadowiii
R I thought the last line in this message was hilarious. Kinda Chapelle-ish, but still funny.
The Wobbler
Download: 152B
Play Time: 0 hours and 30 minutes
Review # 43 for Shadowiii I thought the last line in this message was hilarious. Kinda Chapelle-ish, but still funny.
Them's Fightin' Words
    First we had Walthrus. Then we had Super Walrus Cheif. Then we had Surlaw Armageddon (sort of). Now we have Gato Sucio: The Quest for Color, on PHC's maddening, bizzare game spree. Gato Sucio takes place without the wildly popular Super Walrus Man (I WILL KILL THE CREATOR WHILE HE SLEEPS), but it still manages to entertain, thanks to Salom basically taking SWM's place. Unfortunatly, however, the game doesn't manage to keep entertaining. After the first episode, the game slides into being repetitive, as well as the fact that the dialogue gets downright boring. However, the game did manage to give me a few chuckles, which was definatly good. It's a pity it's not up to calaber with Walthrus or War of the Food, though.
    Walthrus style. Ugly. In all honesty, it was funny for Walthrus (a blatant Walthros parody), but in this case they come off as quite ugly, and not very funny either. Though there are a few entertaining graphics (the parts where the heros got their "upgrades" for instance, was a hilarous use of poor graphics to convay a scene that was a blatant parody of those awsome "OMFG UPGRAADZ LOOK HOW COOL I AM NOW" things that are in those AWFUL RPGS THAT I CANT BELIVE YOU PLAY ok I'm getting off topic).

Though, now that I look back, I really couldn't see the graphics any other way. The game has a lot of cutscenes, and they are all extrememly smooth (ranging from explosions to dancing anime girls), just like Walthrus. Also, the battle backdrops are very entertaining (PHC's style for these "awful games"), so that makes up for it a bit. I wouldn't have them any other way, but the way they are isn't wonderful either.

Ah geez, PHC, you've failed me for the first time. Most of PHC's fail to fall into the trap of dull, repetative storyline (except maybe War of the Food, but it didn't really HAVE a storyline, so...), but this one does. Badly. After Episode 1 (which is really funny, I think the game should have ended there), the plot basically consists of 1. There is a boss. 2. Kill him 3. Make whitty dialogue and go to next episode. Except the last one, which is the same thing except you are a robot. It's too bad, that the story dies off, but it does. I guess that's all I can say.


PHC is a wonder with funny, random dialogue. It reminds me of Arfenhouse, except it is coherent. The characters have extremely overdrawn personallities, and they say some really funny stuff to go along with it. It is a pity that the last few episodes dont' really have a story to provide chances for silly dialogue, but PHC still does a decent job all the way through. However, if it ever gets as bad as the last few episodes (that is, I'm actually considering quitting because it is *gasp* dull), I'll have to kill you because you are past your prime, and no one ever wants that to happen. ;_;
    In truth, there really is none. It's like Walthrus. The difference in this one is that the battles are...a major inconvinience. At least in Walthrus you could spend the money on SOMETHING (even if it was rabbit and Big O pictures), while in this one battles provide no point but to slow you down. The only battle I enjoyed was the one where Salom gets XP (that was funny).

I also noticed what I think might be a bug...when you kill the first boss (forgot his name...he says "B**ch got slapped), he spawns a Yuk on death. Is this intentional? It seems like it is an error...
    Extrememly dull. Your special skills in this one don't do any extra damage, so there is no point in using them. You can't get hurt (except on one ocassion) or die. You don't get any bonuses for winning battles. Because of this, it made the game REALLY frustrating. I hated playing the battles, and I'd run from as many as possible. Also, because of the dullness of the battles, it made the random encounter rate seem too high (it probably actually isn't too high for a normal rpg, but these battles HAVE NO POINT). The battles were a major frustration, I'd like to see their amount decreased.
  Map Design
    They are simple, you just follow the path and cry whenever you get into one of those extrememly boring battles. Some even have arrows built into the maps in case you get lost. Simple, stupid, but it works out just fine.
    Again, it's made to be easy. The downside is your special attacks are useless, so the game is essentially either a spacebar smasher (for those who'll actually fight), or an escape-key presser (for those who hate the obnoxious battles). The only skill that does a lot of power is Donatello's move, which does INSANE damage. But you don't have him for long, so what's the point?
    Typical Wathrus music. I'm getting quite sick of it by now, to be honest. You might want to pick up some new tunes soon.
    I enjoyed the first episode a LOT, especially the Castle Paradox reference. After that the game was amazingly tedious and dull, even the dialogue couldn't save it from its horrible battles and awful, repetative story. I'm disappointed, but in all honesty it wasn't that bad an experience. It just doesn't compare to PHC's other games (except maybe Scottie Goes to Hell), which is too bad. But I did enjoy the first episode a lot, so hopefully PHC's next game will be like that instead of the other episodes in this game.
Final Blows
    The battles were bad, but endurable (at least for the first episode). The story was an abomination after episode one. The dialogue was witty, fresh, and entertaining. But it couldn't save the game, unfortunatly. Overall, stick to the first episode. It's a laugh riot. After that, don't bother unless you are REALLY desperate for something to make you laugh even a LITTLE (though in truth, if you wanted something like that, you could just watch some of the newer Simpson episodes. It's basically the same theory).

PHC, ok work, but you know I'm picky and want it perfect, heh. However, don't stop making these parodies, they are very funny. I'm also glad you managed to stay away from overusing a joke (Super Walrus Man wasn't in this game, which was a good idea). But he'd better be back in the next one. ^_^

"Salom, you are colored!" Heh, that and this line are definatly for the books. :D
Final Scores
Graphics: 3.5/10.0
Ugly. They sort of fit (that is, I can't think of any other style that would even come close to working), but they are still ugly. The cutscenes and backdrops are neat, though.
Storyline: 6/10.0
Clever dialogue (as usual), but a very dull story. I was disappointed, to say the least, that I downloaded the latest version to find nothing very exceptional had been added. Ah well. Dialogue: 4.5, Story: 1.5
Gameplay: 2/10.0
The battles are just awful. Honestly. They serve no purpose (though they do have some jokes hidden in them), and get tedious and a nucience after the fifth one. Lower the random encounter if possible, or have some point in the game where you can buy something (and give money in battles).
Music: 3.5/10.0
It's the same stuff from your last who knows how many games. Entertaining, sure. But it's getting VERY old.
Enjoyment: 4.5/10.0
It was decent. Episode one was awsome, and makes this worth the download. But that's all I really enjoyed about it. (you can kinda tell, too; both my screenshots are from the first episode :P)
Overall Grade: D+
Final Thoughts
    After you play episode one, you might as well quit. Though there are a few funny parts after that, they are to few and far between to go searching for.  

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