Them's Fightin'
Words |
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The word terrible. Many people define it as "bad". Which that's pretty much what it means. I know very little about the contest in which Hentai Quest was made for, but what I do know is that this game is terrible. In many many ways. Not just the biggest thing which I will describe in the following paragraphs.
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Graphics |
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I will divide this section in two, one for graphics, and one for "porn".
Graphically the game was decent. With maybe three or four tiles for the entire game and decent walkabouts it could have been good. But really, when you click to download Hentai Quest, are you downloading it for the graphics? Well, hehehe, not the graphics in this section.
The section for porn has arrived you perverts. I'd call ChaosNyte a perv for this game but there were many things that lacked in the game's porn. First of all, I don't think I saw a picture that wasn't posing. Every picture was either a man holding a clothed woman, or a posed woman messing with her undergarments in which you couldn't see anything. I must admit I downloaded this game to see just how "Graphic(hehe)" this game was, and this was by far the worst porn I have seen. The OHR royally trashed all hopes for decent color distributions too. It's like Pitch Black and OHRDate's imported picture things. They look like crap but you know what they are right? Yeah, and when you're looking at porn do you really wonna see fucked up colorings? I think not.
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Storyline |
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OMG! This game has the best story of all time! YOU WALK IN AND THE DUDE'S LIKE "WELCOME TO BOB'S PORNO SHOP!" OMG! YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENS NEXT! Keeps you in supsense throughout the whole game! Okay that's sarcasm if I ever wrote any. The game has no storyline.
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Gameplay |
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Well, I have no idea what the player does in terms of this section. Because the only type of playing is uhh.... well you get it. And I hope to God that no one does to this. It's horrible. Basically all you do in this game is walk around looking at hentai. No big quest, just hentai.
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Battle |
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The only battle is how fast you can exit out of the game once you see the EVIL PICTURES IN THE BACK WALL!!!! Scary...
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Map Design |
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It was a nice size store. Heh. Although that's all there was in that entire game, one map. Uno mapa. Or is it "mapa uno"? I'm not great at Spanish. Anyways, the store is set up the way it is so that you can clearly walk through aisles to get to more and more hentai. That's the only purpose of the map really. No doors or anything.
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Balance |
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Let's see... Balance... For a porn game. Um, the only thing to balance would be the different types of porno lying around. Which I guess CN did. Not that it's anything to be proud of because half of them or more you couldn't see too well because of bad coloring.
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Music |
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My computer cannot play BAM so I cannot judge this area...
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Enjoyment |
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I didn't enjoy the game. I didn't expect too, I was just eager to see how terrible a terrible game could be. I guess I can congradulate you ChaosNyte, you have successfully made a very terrible game.
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Final Blows |
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ChaosNyte, I believe somewhere you said I used dirty humor, and I may have shown some nasty stuff in the Mr.Triangle games but... That last picture in the back wall jumps a hundred spaces up the ladder in terms of terrible. I haven't seen you make too many games that were decent, and looks like I have yet to be impressed. All I can say now is that I hope Shadowiii is right on something you're working on now. Just don't put the back wall picture in it. ^_^;
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