Castle Paradox

Chaos Nyte · Reviewer Joined: 03 Jan 2003 Posts: 511 Location: Hirakata

By the grand masters of awesome, TokyoLove and ChaosNyte are once again happy to follow in the traditions of such greats as Gilbert, Ilbis, and PHC. Enjoy, and please, don't sue.

http://www.castleparadox.com/forum/gamelist-display.php?game=629

Already critics are praising this work of sheer malign genius:

Moogle 1-
"Mogri1: O_o
Mogri1: is there any way to get past the first shot?
Mogri1: stupid dog always dies first thing
Mogri1: the game has like five seconds of playtime"

Cube-
"Masamune49: Hmm... I'll check it out when I get back into Windows.
Chaos Nyte: Booooooooo
Masamune49: Oookay...

"

Iblis · Posted: Sat Mar 12, 2005 9:30 pm Post subject:

Heh, this is more following in the footsteps of "dog gets hit by car."

Also, it's Iblis. The B comes before the L.

RedMaverickZero · Posted: Sat Mar 12, 2005 9:49 pm Post subject:

I don't get it...
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Gizmog1 · Posted: Sat Mar 12, 2005 9:52 pm Post subject:

Man, I played it like a million times, but when I finally got to the ending, it was all worth it. Who was that hottie, by the way? She definitely made it worth my while, I'm gonna suggest this game to all my friends, if they can hold down the Enter button long enough. (Speaking of which, I wouldn't mind ENTERING that girl in the winning shot, iff'n you know what I mean)

JSH357 · Joined: 02 Feb 2003 Posts: 1705

You got the last one?!

Fucker, I keep getting the next-to-last. How the hell are you holding the button that long?

Chaos Nyte · Reviewer Joined: 03 Jan 2003 Posts: 511 Location: Hirakata

Giz, JSH, for your dedication in unlocking RR's MANY secrets, I have taken the liberty of sending both of you official RR shot glasses. I see I forgot to mention this in my initial post, but the game also installs quite a bit of spyware onto your computer to see what, if any, RR products you might also be interested in. Russian Roulette: Kitten, Baby, Hot Girl, and Christmas edition have all been selected as RR titles you might also enjoy.

On, and Red, for some reason, our spyware detects you would be interested in "RR: Rape The Corpse Edition". I'll send it along to you directly.

Ysoft_Entertainment · Posted: Sun Mar 13, 2005 1:49 pm Post subject:

Chaos Nyte · Reviewer Joined: 03 Jan 2003 Posts: 511 Location: Hirakata

Obviously you haven't played enough of RR to know what Giz is talking about, Ysoft. And under what grounds could I be sued on? Hundreds of OHR games let the player the merrily slaughter their way through dogs, cats, even humans!

Ysoft_Entertainment · Posted: Sun Mar 13, 2005 4:47 pm Post subject:

the sueing part was a joke. but seriously, there is no girl(unless this was a joke on Giz's part, which probably was). anyone remembers the old version of ohr gfx, which lets you view the backgrounds/tilesets without the password? thats what I used. being a programmer has its positive sides. Big grin

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TMC · Posted: Mon Mar 14, 2005 2:47 am Post subject:

best game eva

"nice game CN, definately not worth playing"

best review eva
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LeRoy_Leo · Posted: Mon Mar 14, 2005 9:20 am Post subject:

CN, you desherve a shpanking for thish. >o<

PS: I am off to investigate this game a little more and then drop the hammer on it.
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Gizmog1 · Posted: Mon Mar 14, 2005 11:38 pm Post subject:

You're right, Ysoft. Being a Programmer DOES have certain perks, and if you had studied into OHR History a bit, you'd remember that TokyoLove did the first work into OHR Graphics Encryption, which, upon the first unlumping of the file, sends the graphics you select to various hidden places on the harddrive, disguised as all kinds of secret files, like Spyware, until it requests them back from it. It's kind of primitive, so the files had to be called with data and programming stored in the files for textboxes, so it cut back on the games text capacity, but other than that it was a terrific work around for the time. I can only imagine, having 2 years to work on it, that it works even better now. It's great to be a programmer, especially if you get to hide your game's secrets from other programming twerps.

EDIT: by the way, thanks for the Shotglass CN. But, for future reference, I'd make it a boxset: Two glasses, one with the dog, one with the hotty. You could enclose instructions for the classic Drinking game, MEXICAN Roulette, in which you fill one glass with water, and one glass with tequila, or both glasses with tequila if you've had a bad day, and take turns downing shots until you pass out.