Castle Paradox

[Voltire]

Do any thing to make someone else laugh, or at least smile. Be funny or puny, nice or mean! Do something!

1) So, Gold walks into a bar and Silver comes a little while after. Silver sees Gold and says "Au!"

2) So, a nuetron walks into a bar and asks the bartender,"How much?" The bartender replies,"For you? No charge!"

[Ronin Catholic]

That's Mama Luigi to you, Mario!
_________________
"I didn't start the flame war;
I don't know what you thought here
'Twas that way when I got here"

"I didn't start the flame war;
I can't understand a word you're saying
nor the game you're playing~"

[J_Taylor]

@Voltire

I had to re-read both of them. The second one was hilarious.
_________________
Elemental: .75%
Heart of Darkness: 0% (crash)
The Mansion: .05%
Shattered Alliance: .05%

See a pattern forming? I do, dammit.

[Bagne]

Awesome joke #1

So, I go to the doctor because I've got a stalk of broccoli stuck in my nose, and a carrot in my eye, and an apple crushed halfway down my ear ...
and I'm like:
"I am in horrible pain. What gives, man?"
And the doctor says:
"You're not eating properly."

Awesome joke #2

In QM class, Macbeth is learning about creation and annihilation operators, and he says:
"Is this a dagger I see before me?"
_________________
Working on rain and cloud formation

[Ronin Catholic]

It's a stone, Luigi. You didn't make it.
_________________
"I didn't start the flame war;
I don't know what you thought here
'Twas that way when I got here"

"I didn't start the flame war;
I can't understand a word you're saying
nor the game you're playing~"

[Voltire]

Verizon wants to discontinue phone book service because Chuck Norris tears up all the phone books for fun.

Chuck Norris spends his spare time solving the Theory of Everything.

There used to be a street named after Chuck Norris, but it was changed because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.

Death once had a near-Chuck Norris experience

Some magicans can walk on water, Chuck Norris can swim through land.

Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird

Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

Chuck Norris was in all 6 Star Wars movies ... As The Force.

Chuck Norris is physically unable to be physically unable.

Chuck Norris once urinated in a semi truck's gas tank as a joke....that truck is now known as Optimus Prime.

Chuck Norris made a Happy Meal cry.

Because Norris.

[Voltire]

If you want to smile or have others around you smile, do these two things:

1) Say "in the bathtub" after every fortune cookie you read out loud.

2) Replace 1/2 of the nouns you use with the word "wenis". (That IS how you spell it, right? Wheenis? Weeniss?)

[Ronin Catholic]

Chuck Norris can double-post and not look like a retard.

Chuck Norris promoted Mike Huckabee.
_________________
"I didn't start the flame war;
I don't know what you thought here
'Twas that way when I got here"

"I didn't start the flame war;
I can't understand a word you're saying
nor the game you're playing~"

[Voltire]

STAN: I want to be a woman. From now on, I want you all to call me 'Loretta'.
REG: What?!
LORETTA: It's my right as a man.
JUDITH: Well, why do you want to be Loretta, Stan?
LORETTA: I want to have babies.
REG: You want to have babies?!
LORETTA: It's every man's right to have babies if he wants them.
REG: But... you can't have babies.
LORETTA: Don't you oppress me.
REG: I'm not oppressing you, Stan. You haven't got a womb! Where's the foetus going to gestate?! You going to keep it in a box?!”

[Ronin Catholic]

Everybody Polkamon!
_________________
"I didn't start the flame war;
I don't know what you thought here
'Twas that way when I got here"

"I didn't start the flame war;
I can't understand a word you're saying
nor the game you're playing~"