| Them's Fightin'
Words |
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In a game with over 11 hours of gameplay, one will find themselves not searching very long for Jarrod's missing wallet.
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| Graphics |
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Graphics are poor, ripped, and the lack of effort is apparent. Many graphics, especially enemy graphics are ripped from Super Mario RPG, while the rest of the graphics have no shading and are very basic and sloppy. Enemies are uninspired, and the walkabouts are too lazy to fully turn as they should. The graphics are all either ripped or very newbie style... although graphic ripping is a sign of a newb to begin with.
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| Storyline |
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The storyline is half rip-off Super Mario RPG, half original scattered story. Jarrod is a teenager who can't see without his glasses who must go from his own neighborhood to Yoshi's world to other rip off worlds, trying to find his lost wallet which may be connected to the giant sword that dropped down onto a stadium during a Mets game. Dialogue is poor, there is no direction to the game, and it makes no sense, aside from the constant references to the SMRPG story.
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| Gameplay |
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Gameplay is tedious and everything is either too little or too much. Coming upon money and experience is extremely difficult, and most battles are short to offset this, but even the short battles give measly amounts of experience and money, which means it'll take forever to level up and you'll never be able to afford anything. There is nothing truely creative to this, it is a standard OHR RPG.
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Battle |
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The game ranges from battles where enemies only take one to two hits to be killed, or enemies that are overpowered and do too much damage and take a while to kill. One thing is certain though - it is simply just too tedious. Not only do you get such little experience and money from fighting, you CANNOT escape ANY battle. That's right. The escape key is absolutely useless in this game. Any attempts to run from a battle will result in a message of 'come on you pussy!' telling you to stay and fight, even if you're going to get slaughtered. This is not too surprising, considering that the intelligence of teenage males are relative here, where lack of judgment is constant and stupifying. As a side note, the only battle I found interesting is where you cross the freeway in the first map, which results in a car attempting to swerve out of hitting you (and if it does, you die. You can't run so it's all up to chance).
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Map Design |
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The maps are bland, linear and uninteresting to trek. Long narrow pathways are dungeons, all with ripped graphics of course, and the city you start in looks like any typical urban neighborhood, but there is a strong lack of variety. Long uninspired areas is all you'll explore here.
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Balance |
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Considering you get about 1 to 10 cents per battle and a Pepsi to heal 30 HP costs 100 cents (and you don't even want to know how much other items cost) and killing four enemies only give you about 6 experience, you're in for long hours of button mashing if you manage to survive with the lack of healing items, special attacks and unique enemies.
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| Music |
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Music is all ripped, and one of the main sources is - you guessed it. Super Mario RPG. Unfortunately, they weren't ripped very well, and it would be better if you just turn off your speakers.
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| Enjoyment |
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I didn't enjoy it. And you won't either, unless you like redundancy and repitition (wow, that was redundant).
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| Final Blows |
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This game needs to balance its battles for one, and allow you to run away. Items need to either be cheaper or you need to recieve more money. The game lacks strongly when it comes to storyline, but battles especially.
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...and these are the kind of comments you'll get if you try to run. |
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Final Scores
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Graphics: 1.5/10.0 |
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Ripped graphics and bland shoddy original ones.
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Storyline: 1/10.0
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Super Mario RPG meets Jarrod loses his wallet. |
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Gameplay: 1/10.0 |
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I don't like button mashing battles with little gold and experience
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Music: 1/10.0
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Ripped, and done badly. |
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Enjoyment: 1/10.0
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I didn't enjoy it. |
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Overall Grade:
F |
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| Final Thoughts |
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There is nothing 'super' about this game aside from its superbly tedious battle system. Eleven hours of gameplay you say? Those hours are better spent watching paint dry. |
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