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ARFENHOUSE!!!1 #!!!!!!! vs. The Wobbler
ARFENHOUSE!!!1 #!!!!!!!
Misteroo
Download: 1.16 MB
V.S.
The Wobbler
Review # 3 for The Wobbler
Them's Fightin' Words
    This review is reposted from HamsterSpeak #3, May 2007 - Direct link.

Arfenhouse 3 (Proper title ARFENHOUSE!!!1 3!!!!!!!) is the third of a series of parody games by Misteroo. Pretty much everyone in the OHR community and a decent number of people outside know about this game; it's incredibly well reviewed (A- average on Castle Paradox, with the lowest review being a B) and has a substantially high download count for an OHR game.

The amount of praise the game received when in was released puzzled me, and the fact that people still hold it in such high regard is embarrassing and confusing.

I know I'm in the minority when I say that I find nothing worthwhile in this game. People loved its humor. People still quote it to this day. It's an intentionally bad game, and would have rightly won awards in any Terrible Games Contest it would have entered, but people seem to genuinely like this game. The humor and game play are both absolutely unbearable, and I'm having a hard time deciding which is worse.

Since 99% of the game's humor is exactly the same joke repeated over and over and over again (bad, unreadable English mixed with netspeak and videogame references), it will be very simple to determine whether or not you'll enjoy this supposed masterpiece. Here's a description of the game, written by its author:

"LOLOLOKOK SO LAYK UMMM WUN DAY HOUSMAZTR BEZ OWT WIT PIAKCHU WEN SUDDLNTELNLY A KOMET IZ KUMMIN!!!1111!!ING~!!OMFGLOL!!! SO HOWSEMASTR IZ LAYK \"GRR I MEEN GRR THISZ SUKCSU!!! LOL\" SO HIM!!!!! PIAKCHU DESYCDEAD 2 ADN DEF EAT COMEET 2 SAYKFV URTH!!!! HE TEEMZ UP WIT HIZZ NEMEESISZ EVL KITTY ADN TEHY HAFF ESEZX ADN TEN BILLY KUMZ ADN BATS H!!ER!!! SHE Z DED N HM BEZ SAD SO HE g0Z 2 GET TEH HOUSMAZTR SWORD ADN TEHN j0 SEZ \"I hate you people\" KUZ HE SUKZ!!! LOL!!!1! SO LAYK HE GETZ TEH SWORD N TEN DAAADAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA TEH JINTOVMAHBUTT CUMZ ADN D3Ztr0YZ TEH ARFNHOUSZZE!!!! w00f>OLOL IZ FUNNY N HOSUEZJZZT WINZ ADN HE FAYTSZ BILLY ADN HE g0Z S0000PRSAYUUUHN!!!! BILY IZ KILLD ADN EVERY1 GETZ MAARREEED!!!!!

Are you laughing your ass off? If you are, you're in the great majority of people who have played this game. If you're not, I respect you. If you're undecided, perhaps a look at the screenshots will help you decide.

This stupidity keeps up for nearly an hour. Between the terrible dialogue scenes, you'll wander through long, single color areas where you only know you're moving at all by checking your map. You'll fight an enormous number of joke-free random battles against a tiny variety of enemies, and every now and then fight a boss who likely has no relevance to the story and no joke to him. Some of the bosses are actually funny; a battle against a giant Richard Nixon certainly makes me smile. The fights themselves involve holding the escape key the second the battle begins. None of your character skills do anything, and everything will kill you if you don't run from every fight.

If the purpose of this game is to parody bad OHR games, it fails, because even the worst of the worst (and I've played a ton of abysmal OHR games throughout the years) is generally more fun than this. If it's just supposed to make you laugh, I haven't played any comedy games that are less funny. I don't understand how otherwise intelligent people can find this game amusing.

I'm clearly not opposed to intentionally bad games; I've made my fair share of them myself. I am opposed to pumping out the same joke for an hour straight, even more so when that joke is terrible to begin with. A joke can only be made so many times; even the best become stale. Apparently, the internet is a place where this is an exception, since on nearly every forum that exists you'll find people puking out the same catchphrases f or years at a time and never tiring of them. This game is for the people who have been intentionally spelling words incorrectly since 1996 and still laughing every time they use the word "teh." This game is for people who still make "all your base" jokes on a regular basis. This game is for the "Chuck Norris facts" fanatics. This game is people who were masturbating over Snakes on a Plane half a year before it was released. Essentially, this game is for the people who make the internet stupid, and it's depressing that it's considered a classic in any community, let alone one that has produced some genuinely wonderful and funny games.
Final Scores
Graphics: 1/10.0
Storyline: 1/10.0
Gameplay: 1/10.0
Music: 1/10.0
Overall Grade: F-
Final Thoughts
    Essentially, this game is for the people who make the internet stupid, and it's depressing that it's considered a classic in any community, let alone one that has produced some genuinely wonderful and funny games.  



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