Gamelist Review List Song List Watched Journals Forum IRC Gamelist Song List Review List Forum Articles IRC Log Out Add Game Edit Games Add Reviews Edit Reviews Add Songs Edit Songs Log Out Edit Games Edit Reviews Edit Songs Sign Up Log In My Journal My Game Journals Watched Journals All Journals Journal Settings All Journals About Us Staff FAQ
Castle Paradox
Title Bar
Log In Box
 
______  
[more]
    1) Rising Tension by Rimudora
    2) HL - Main Theme by Rimudora
    3) HL - Theme of Necromancer by Rimudora
    4) HL - Battle Theme by Rimudora
    5) Synthtastic by sheamkennedy
The Way of the Warrior (Final!) vs. Shadowiii
The Way of the Warrior (Final!) The most beautiful battle ever to grace the OHR.
doom900
Download: 690 KB
V.S.
Shadowiii
Play Time: too hours and many minutes
Review # 35 for Shadowiii The most beautiful battle ever to grace the OHR.
Them's Fightin' Words
    Ah....the awful game contest. Certainly an interesting concept idea: make the worst possible game on the OHR. After playing through all of the entrees, I'd have to say that this one ranks pretty high up there in "worst game I've seen in a long while." There is one problem:

It wasn't made for the awful game contest.

Way of the Warrior is an abismal game. Containing mostly ripped graphics including single-frame pictures from FF7 games, poorly pallette swapped 'smilie" NPCS EVERYWHERE, and battles that are so slow and boring I wanted to kill myself...Way of the Warrior is an awful OHR game, and is probably one of the worst I've seen since Seeking_Star's "Orb" or Ryan's "Magnus."
Graphics
    BWAHAHAHHAHAAA! Oh wait, you were serious about graphics. Uh...what can I say? Everything is ripped, except the originally drawn graphics, which are DISGUSTINGLY BAD. The "best" part (that is, the part I got a good laugh out of) was the fact that, as bad as the original graphics were, they looked better then most of the ripped ones! That's right...the ripping was THAT BAD. Reminds me of TMC's Horrible Game Contest Entree without any of the humor. What am I saying, even THAT game ripped better!

NPCs are a disaster. They consist mostly of smiley faces palette swapped, a spirte that looks like a cross between a ripped Kyle from TS and Cloud Strife, and triangles. Yes, triangles. That wander around. OMFG SO KEWL.

Map graphics are...RIPPED. And RIPPED BADLY. The house looked ugly as sin, the desert was a poor mess of the same ripped tile over and over, etc. I won't bother telling you about the rest except they are all ripped, and they are all ripped poorly, and they all made my eyes burn.

Battle graphics are probably the worst of all. The hero graphics are some poorly ripped Final Fantasy 7 sprites, and a "Knight" (who is a poorly ripped person from someone else's OHR game). It seems the creator didn't know how to fix the palette colors when importing, because the heroes are mostly transparent and look AWFUL. The enemies are original (I'm guessing the author never learned how to import enemy graphics also or they'd be ripped too), and look a bit better, but that's like saying Magnus looked better then FFXXX. IE: They still look amazingly bad.

Simply put, the graphics will make your eyes bleed, burn, and then melt. Yeah, all that. I'd recommend playing with your eyes closed to save yourself the torture.
 
Storyline
    Luckily I don't have to write much here (yay for lazy review writing!) because THERE IS NO STORYLINE AT ALL. The most story you ever get is what is in the game description: "Journey through 5 different lands killing monsters and buying weapons and armor." Wait, I lied, that isn't story at all. It is just a game description.

There are no text boxes telling the story of this Cloud look-alike who wanders the world of smilies who double as shops, recrutement centers, inns, maps, and on and on for everything you can fit in a store selection. In all honesty, I'm glad. I don't really want to know what is going on.
 
Gameplay
    OH PLEASE NO.

The gameplay in this game is HORRIBLE to say the least. I mean, it is REALLY REALLY BAD. First off, you start in a map with about 20,000 palette swapped "smilies" sitting around, all of which are shops. When you talk to them, you see a text box with a background screen (which appears to be the full ripped tileset the author imported...awsome), and then you are presented with the longest store menu in OHR history. Yeah, if the store bitset let you do ANYTHING you can do it here. I didn't even KNOW the OHR stores had this many choices. You can then buy weapons (which you cannot afford) or recrut other FF7 look-alike clones.

But wait! There's more! If you talk to any npcs that are MOVING on this opening map (a moving smily or a triangle) you can RIDE it! Wowowowowowow so cool.

The best part was that when I pressed escaped and choose the selection one from the bottom, it let me quit! Ah, where would we be without that feature?
 
  Battle
    Battles are horrible, and obviously not playtested. First things first: enemies never hit you. Ever. They seem to have their attacks set on "self" when they attack, because they ONLY HIT THEMSELVES 99% OF THE TIME.

Your attack is similar, it seems that you can attack anyone, which means the default curser starts on yourself. HOW WONDERFUL. So you can't even space-bar smash your way through this game.

On top of THAT, the speed is AMAZINGLY LOW. You'll wait a good thirty seconds before getting your chance to attack, all the time the monsters are attacking themselves over and over. Good grief.
 
  Map Design
    Just as bad as everything else. You walk through a cave door and appear in the right hand corner of a field. There are maps filled (literally) with thousands of smiley faces everywhere. How the author even considered this game to make any sense is still beyond me. Where do I go? What am I trying to do? Why do I even care?  
  Balance
    As stated in battle, the battles are majorly screwed up. It is almost impossible to determine the balance, because I could kill amost every enemy in one hit, and they almost never hit me (plus there were smilies everywhere with inns that were amazingly cheep, so I never had to worry about dying).

They weren't fun.
 
Music
    All taken from the free BAMs provided with the engine. Seems the author wasn't bright enough to figure out how to use midi2bam, and decided to randomly throw all the included bams in...random places. There is no sign of intelligent or thoughtful music placement. It is just all slopped in there without anyone even bothering to look twice. All I can say about this is, at least it wasn't silent.  
Enjoyment
    Does it look like I enjoyed it? Not one little bit. At first, after reading the description, I thought "Interesting concept. Maybe this is like &And or something, with various dungeons and what-not that you journey through." This game doesn't even deserve to have &And MENTIONED IN ITS REVIEW. It was a HORRIBLE experience, and I hope none of you have to go through something like this EVER in your lives. Avoid this like you'd avoid smallpox.  
Final Blows
    Sure, it's the author's first game, but that is no excuse for what a mess this game is. You'll learn pretty quick, doom900, that ripping is quite put-down here (to say the least), and ripping POORLY is an even worse crime. Of course, that is nothing compared to making amazingly tedious and horribly designed battles and maps. Honestly, does anyone every playtest their games anymore? How could you play through this game and even CONSIDER it to be something you'd want to show ANYONE? If I had made it I would delete it, burn my hard drive, and then get theripy in an attempt to repress all memories about it.

A horrible game, definatly one of the worst I've ever seen. Avoid it at all costs.
With an army this size, the smilies could take over the world.

With an army this size, the smilies could take over the world.
Final Scores
Graphics: 1/10.0
95% ripped, 5% original, 100% ugly.
Storyline: 1/10.0
There is none.
Gameplay: 1/10.0
Unbalanced, with poor map design and battles that make gnawing my hand off seem like more fun. Honestly, did you even PLAY your game before releasing it to the general public?
Music: 1.5/10.0
You get a 0.5 because I like the OHR Bams. That is more then you deserve.
Enjoyment: 1/10.0
No. It was an awful experience, and no one should EVER download this game EVER. The only games I've seen that were worse was that "ORANJE CHU" or whatever game, and "FFXXX", both made for the horrible game contest. Ugh.
Overall Grade: F-
Final Thoughts
    It gets my vote for "worst game in the awful game contest." Too bad it wasn't an entree.  


All games, songs, and images © their respective owners.
Terms of Service
©2008 Castle Paradox